RED-LINE SMILEY :)

Boxster Cult membership
Posted by Johnny on Tuesday, 3 March 1998, at 10:39 p.m.

I have been reading posts here for several weeks and I am now seriously considering applying for membership in your Boxster Cult. Through extensive on-line research, e-mail, rumor and hearsay I have managed to put together a list of what appear to be at least some of the requirements for membership in your Boxster Cult. If some of the present Cult members would be so kind as to review my list and see if there are any additional membership requirements of which I am unaware.

(A) You must own a Boxster or at least have one on order. While I do not believe this to be 100% percent true, I did not want to take a chance so I plunked down $5,000 and ordered an Arena Red/Savannah Beige Boxster with several cool options that I hope are non-conflicting. I have been given production months of April, May, June & November with promised delivery dates of from this coming Saturday to Christmas of 2002.

(B) Your name must be Chris or you must have had physical contact(not necessarily a sexual relationship) with someone named Chris. My girlfriend's name is Chris, so I think I have this one covered.

(C) You must know exactly how many baby diapers it takes to do the ultimate treatment on the back plastic window. I believe this is 15-68 depending upon the relative humidity and dew point.

(D) You must know what kind of wax to spray on the inside of the wheel well during your weekly wheel-removal-cleaning process. Uuuhhh, I have forgotten this but I swear I will go back and read up on this if my membership application is considered.

(E) You must, without hesitation or fear of ridicule, be willing to perform a wheel metal analysis with your tongue. I have been practicing on my Explorer.

(F) You must know the exact part numbers for sun visors without air bag warning stickers. 986.731.031.08 EBY & 986.731.032.08 EBY

(G) You must make a post to Pete's Boxster Board, preferably a short post. Short?...ooops...sorry.

Please let me know if I have forgotten anything important. Can I join yet?

And followup posted by Johnny on Wednesday, 4 March 1998, at 4:17 p.m.

Thank you for your response Mr. Porsche Pete, it is indeed an honor to even be considered for Boxster Cult membership by Porsche Pete's Cult Committe. Within the past hour I visited Amazon.com and ordered Becker's Boxster book and promise to keep it on the floor beside my bed. I have no clue as to what the "Boomerang thing" is, but I swear to still mention it often. I have become very angst ridden about options and color combinations. Do you think Arena Red and Savannah Beige look good? I have been thinking a lot about the Boomerang thing. I know the acronym for each stage that my Boxster will go through and in fact, just this morning, I faxed a copy of the acronym list(copied from FAQ list of course) to my dealer asking him to fill in the anticipated date when my Boxster will enter each stage. I made a big note yesterday to remind myself to program the power door locks with my dealer's lap top before leaving in my new Boxster. I sold my Harley. I have discussed designs for a Boxster tattoo with my girlfriend. I have engineered child seat restraints in my sleep and have already purchased a baby receiving blanket for the back window. I am confident that if my Boxster Cult membership application were to be favorably acted upon, I would be one of the most paranoid members, easily in the top 25 of paranoia. Did I mention the Boomerang thing?

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